Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Common

Head or Tails

Heads: anything about common

When I decided to marry Weiers, my cousins (2 of them from my dad side) wanted to to know why I would marry a white man instead of a coloured. If you know anything about South African history you would know that we were seperated according to our race, we lived and schooled in designated areas, we went to beaches designated to us according to race. In sense we had smaller countries within a country. Many times I get asked if I felt a culture shock when I lived in the USA or now in Northern Ireland. The difference I have experienced these countries were nothing compared to the culture I experienced when we did an One Day Exchange between the schools in 15km radius from where I lived in Durban, South Africa.

I told my cousin that I had more in common with Weiers despite the fact that he was white than I had with the boy that lived next door to me. Weiers and I grew up listening to the same gospel music, preachers and even discovered that we went to the same camps (our church camps included 3 of the 4 general race groups). Our parents brought us up with the same values for life, religion, education etc...... We found that we had a lot in common and that we could celebrate our differences. We both believed that love was a choice, that it was a commitment and we choice to love in each other.

The song at our Wedding was Love in Language by Sandi Patti. The key line in it for me:
We'll find too much in common To pretend it isn't there
Its been my experience that once people actual face their prejudice they find that their is no foundation and they can actually let them go (most not all). This has been true for some of people that opposed our union. They are now part of my support base.
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